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How Great NonProfit
Pitches Go Very Wrong*
Erica Mills
Chief Word Nerd
Claxon Marketing
*and what you
can do about it
The average adult uses 15,000 words a day.
According to Matthias R. Mehl, University of Arizona Assistant Professor of Psychology, in a 2007 research
study
Some of your words will be about what you do.
elevator pitch noun  e-ˈ
l - v -t r  pichə ˌ ā ə ˈ
a short summary used to
quickly and simply define
a person, profession,
product, service,
organization or event and
its value proposition.*
*source:wikipedia
OK, seriously: why do we
get tongue-tied when it
comes to delivering a
pitch?
Get nervous just thinking about delivering your pitch? Quick, look at this cute
dog picture and you’ll feel better.
Anxiety-inducing Reason #1: We think a pitch
is about closing a deal.
It’s really about
opening a
door!
The point of a pitch is to inspire action and
engagement. You want the recipient to…
Show interest
Ask questions
Repeat your
message to
others
Anxiety-inducing Reason #2: We
have all experienced bad
pitches. We fear sounding like a
Used Car Salesman, kinda like
this dude. (Ick!)
“Say it ain’t so!”
All this anxiety about closing doors and
sounding like a used car salesman leads to
(gasp) PITCHFALLS!
Top 5 Pitchfalls
1. You sound like a robot.
2. You talk about yourself.
3. You talk too much.
4. You use jargon.
5. You sound like a talking tagline.
We’re about to
fix some
PITCHFALLS, yo.
Pitchfall #1: You sound like a
robot
This does
not compute.
Answer: #1 Your
message was
handed down from
on high.
Question: Why the robo-
speak, friend?
Answer #2: You fear rejection.
“Here’s the hand. You know what to do.”
Cruel irony alert: The more you care, the more
you fear rejection, and the more you sound
like a robot. Doh.
Remember…there are three
components to communication
What you say
(like, you know,
the actual words)
How you say it,
i.e. tone of voice
Body language,
including (but not
limited to) gestures,
facial expressions,
and arm crossing.
#1 Verbal #2 Para-verbal #3 Non-verbal
The fix for
verbal
robotitis?
Practice saying
your pitch using all
three components,
aka like yourself. If
it’s too difficult, it’s
a sign your pitch
needs to be
simplified. (Or it’s a
sign that you are,
actually, a robot.)
Me.
Me.
Me.
Me.
Pitchfall #2: You only talk about yourself.
zzzz…
The five most frequently used words (written,
spoken and otherwise):
#5: a
#4: to
#3: and
#2: the
And, THE most frequently used word…(drumroll
please)…
“I”
HUMAN NATURE 101: People care most about
themselves*
*even really nice people
THEIR kids
THEIR goals
THEIR job
THEIR beliefs
The fix: Connect what YOU do to
what THEY care about
Talk about benefits instead of
outcomes
Use “you” and “your” (or in certain
parts of the US, “yous”)
We build eco-
friendly homes for
people like you
and your family.
Blah
Blah
Blah
Blah
Pitchfall #3: You talk too much.
When you tell someone everything, they
remember nothing.
I can’t believe
you’re still
talking. I’m
thinking about
what I am going
to have for
dinner.
“You have to
understand
that nothing
appeals to
everybody”
-Gene Simmons
The fix: develop three different-sized
versions of your pitch
Tall
Grande
Venti
10 words: for
new
acquaintances
25 words: for
introductory
conversations
about what
you do
50 words: for when
you have a captive
audience
So it's really about
synergic abilities in
the social
ecosphere.
Pitchfall #4: You use jargon
You lost me
at
synergic…
Over-used words lose their
meaning
It was so IRONIC, it was LITERALLY AMAZING!
The fix: Outsider editorial review
Have someone outside of your organization listen to your pitch.
Ask them to highlight jargon, buzzwords and quasi-meaningless
gobbledygook.
And if you say a no-no word, everybody drinks!
I work for Nike.
We help you just
do it!
Pitchfall #5: You sound like a talking tagline.
Taglines are read, not said When it
absolutely,
positively has
to be there
overnight.
Dude, nobody
talks like that
The fix: translate your pitch into something people can say without
sounding weird or creepy
People reading taglines feeling both weird AND creepy
Practice
Practice isn’t about perfection. It’s about
progress. Test your pitch by asking:
Is it remarkable? Will people talk about you, your
work, your cause to others?
Do people ask questions that will lead to a
conversation that will, eventually, lead to
engagement in, and support of, you, your work,
your cause?
Want to be really, truly, completely free of all
Pitchfalls?
Buy your own copy of Pitchfalls: why bad pitches

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Pitchfalls: how to take your elevator pitch from terrible to terrific in no time flat

  • 1. How Great NonProfit Pitches Go Very Wrong* Erica Mills Chief Word Nerd Claxon Marketing *and what you can do about it
  • 2. The average adult uses 15,000 words a day. According to Matthias R. Mehl, University of Arizona Assistant Professor of Psychology, in a 2007 research study
  • 3. Some of your words will be about what you do. elevator pitch noun e-ˈ l - v -t r pichə ˌ ā ə ˈ a short summary used to quickly and simply define a person, profession, product, service, organization or event and its value proposition.* *source:wikipedia
  • 4. OK, seriously: why do we get tongue-tied when it comes to delivering a pitch? Get nervous just thinking about delivering your pitch? Quick, look at this cute dog picture and you’ll feel better.
  • 5. Anxiety-inducing Reason #1: We think a pitch is about closing a deal. It’s really about opening a door!
  • 6. The point of a pitch is to inspire action and engagement. You want the recipient to… Show interest Ask questions Repeat your message to others
  • 7. Anxiety-inducing Reason #2: We have all experienced bad pitches. We fear sounding like a Used Car Salesman, kinda like this dude. (Ick!)
  • 8. “Say it ain’t so!” All this anxiety about closing doors and sounding like a used car salesman leads to (gasp) PITCHFALLS!
  • 9. Top 5 Pitchfalls 1. You sound like a robot. 2. You talk about yourself. 3. You talk too much. 4. You use jargon. 5. You sound like a talking tagline. We’re about to fix some PITCHFALLS, yo.
  • 10. Pitchfall #1: You sound like a robot This does not compute.
  • 11. Answer: #1 Your message was handed down from on high. Question: Why the robo- speak, friend?
  • 12. Answer #2: You fear rejection. “Here’s the hand. You know what to do.” Cruel irony alert: The more you care, the more you fear rejection, and the more you sound like a robot. Doh.
  • 13. Remember…there are three components to communication What you say (like, you know, the actual words) How you say it, i.e. tone of voice Body language, including (but not limited to) gestures, facial expressions, and arm crossing. #1 Verbal #2 Para-verbal #3 Non-verbal
  • 14. The fix for verbal robotitis? Practice saying your pitch using all three components, aka like yourself. If it’s too difficult, it’s a sign your pitch needs to be simplified. (Or it’s a sign that you are, actually, a robot.)
  • 15. Me. Me. Me. Me. Pitchfall #2: You only talk about yourself. zzzz…
  • 16. The five most frequently used words (written, spoken and otherwise): #5: a #4: to #3: and #2: the And, THE most frequently used word…(drumroll please)… “I”
  • 17. HUMAN NATURE 101: People care most about themselves* *even really nice people THEIR kids THEIR goals THEIR job THEIR beliefs
  • 18. The fix: Connect what YOU do to what THEY care about Talk about benefits instead of outcomes Use “you” and “your” (or in certain parts of the US, “yous”) We build eco- friendly homes for people like you and your family.
  • 20. When you tell someone everything, they remember nothing. I can’t believe you’re still talking. I’m thinking about what I am going to have for dinner.
  • 21. “You have to understand that nothing appeals to everybody” -Gene Simmons
  • 22. The fix: develop three different-sized versions of your pitch Tall Grande Venti 10 words: for new acquaintances 25 words: for introductory conversations about what you do 50 words: for when you have a captive audience
  • 23. So it's really about synergic abilities in the social ecosphere. Pitchfall #4: You use jargon You lost me at synergic…
  • 24. Over-used words lose their meaning It was so IRONIC, it was LITERALLY AMAZING!
  • 25. The fix: Outsider editorial review Have someone outside of your organization listen to your pitch. Ask them to highlight jargon, buzzwords and quasi-meaningless gobbledygook. And if you say a no-no word, everybody drinks!
  • 26. I work for Nike. We help you just do it! Pitchfall #5: You sound like a talking tagline.
  • 27. Taglines are read, not said When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight. Dude, nobody talks like that
  • 28. The fix: translate your pitch into something people can say without sounding weird or creepy People reading taglines feeling both weird AND creepy
  • 29. Practice Practice isn’t about perfection. It’s about progress. Test your pitch by asking: Is it remarkable? Will people talk about you, your work, your cause to others? Do people ask questions that will lead to a conversation that will, eventually, lead to engagement in, and support of, you, your work, your cause?
  • 30. Want to be really, truly, completely free of all Pitchfalls? Buy your own copy of Pitchfalls: why bad pitches

Editor's Notes

  1. Kyle
  2. Kyle: Need an image for each Pitchfall.
  3. Kyle: Need an image for each Pitchfall.