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Intimacy in Marriage
Before reading Chapters 8–12 of  And They Were Not Ashamed ...
Why Couples Have Problems ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]
Why Couples Have Problems  [cont.] ,[object Object],[object Object]
A lack of emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy and unity, which leads to...
Parallel marriage
“ I woke up one day and realized that we have nothing in common anymore.”
“ We’re not soul mates, but we parent well together.”
All this leads to...
Sin!
The Seven Ds ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]
“ Jesus saw sin as wrong but also was able to see  sin as springing from deep and unmet needs  on the part of the sinner.” –President Spencer W. Kimball Ensign , August 1979, 5
“ Unity—emotional and spiritual, as well as physical—is  absolutely essential to a happy marriage , one in which the partners symbolically become one in all things.” – Elder Spencer J. Condie Ensign , July 1986, 52
This unity is only possible through intimacy!
How do we get there? ,[object Object],[object Object]
How do we get there?  [cont.] ,[object Object],[object Object]
Emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy, which leads a couple to true unity and oneness.
“ And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.  
“ Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be  one flesh . And they were both naked [both physically  and emotionally ], the man and his wife, and  were not ashamed .”  –Genesis 2:21–25
“ Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God.”    –1 Corinthians 11:11–12
“ I say unto you, be one; and if ye are not one ye are not mine.”   –D&C 38:27
“ Thou shalt love thy wife [or husband] with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her [or him] and none else. And he [or she] that looketh upon a woman [or man] to lust after her [or him] shall deny the faith, and shall not have the Spirit; and if he [or she] repents not he [or she] shall be cast out.”   –D&C 42:22–23
The Male versus Female Brain
What Your Wives Ache For ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]
What Your Wives Ache For  [cont.] ,[object Object],[object Object]
If all or part of these are missing, your wife... ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]
If all or part of these are missing, your wife...  [cont.] ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]
What Husbands Ache For ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]
What Husbands Ache For  [cont.] ,[object Object],[object Object]
“ And the office of thy calling shall be for a comfort unto...thy husband, in his afflictions, with consoling words, in the spirit of meekness.”   –D&C 25:5
If any of these are absent, your husband... ,[object Object],[object Object]
If any of these are absent, your husband may...  [cont.] ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]
No matter what your husband or wife chooses, it is his or her choice and you are not responsible.
But you have more influence on your spouse than anyone else.
After reading Chapters 8–12...

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Intimacy in Marriage

  • 2. Before reading Chapters 8–12 of And They Were Not Ashamed ...
  • 3.
  • 4.
  • 5. A lack of emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy and unity, which leads to...
  • 7. “ I woke up one day and realized that we have nothing in common anymore.”
  • 8. “ We’re not soul mates, but we parent well together.”
  • 10. Sin!
  • 11.
  • 12. “ Jesus saw sin as wrong but also was able to see sin as springing from deep and unmet needs on the part of the sinner.” –President Spencer W. Kimball Ensign , August 1979, 5
  • 13. “ Unity—emotional and spiritual, as well as physical—is absolutely essential to a happy marriage , one in which the partners symbolically become one in all things.” – Elder Spencer J. Condie Ensign , July 1986, 52
  • 14. This unity is only possible through intimacy!
  • 15.
  • 16.
  • 17. Emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy, which leads a couple to true unity and oneness.
  • 18. “ And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. 
  • 19. “ Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh . And they were both naked [both physically and emotionally ], the man and his wife, and were not ashamed .” –Genesis 2:21–25
  • 20. “ Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God.” –1 Corinthians 11:11–12
  • 21. “ I say unto you, be one; and if ye are not one ye are not mine.” –D&C 38:27
  • 22. “ Thou shalt love thy wife [or husband] with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her [or him] and none else. And he [or she] that looketh upon a woman [or man] to lust after her [or him] shall deny the faith, and shall not have the Spirit; and if he [or she] repents not he [or she] shall be cast out.” –D&C 42:22–23
  • 23. The Male versus Female Brain
  • 24.
  • 25.
  • 26.
  • 27.
  • 28.
  • 29.
  • 30. “ And the office of thy calling shall be for a comfort unto...thy husband, in his afflictions, with consoling words, in the spirit of meekness.” –D&C 25:5
  • 31.
  • 32.
  • 33. No matter what your husband or wife chooses, it is his or her choice and you are not responsible.
  • 34. But you have more influence on your spouse than anyone else.

Editor's Notes

  1. When displaying this slide, a couple acts out a scene from daily life: he is on his laptop one evening trying to get caught up with work while his wife was trying to get the kids to do their homework. A misunderstanding arises between them, and they storm off in a huff.
  2. For this slide, I used a set of different sized boxes to illustrate the way a male brain works, and and a single coil of copper wire to illustrate how the female brain works. From Mark Gungor. See http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoqpjOZxf2M.
  3. The same couple who acted out the scene earlier reappears here. It is the same laptop/homework scenario, but this time the couple uses the skill they have learned by reading chapters 8 through 12 of the book And They Were Not Ashamed . They hold hands, and discuss the situation calmly, while giving each other their complete decision.